The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz: Awaken to the Truth!

The Four Agreements, A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom written by Don Miguel Ruiz, is a guide to living an authentic life by listening to your inner voice, by adhering to four principles, or four agreements.

I stumbled upon it at the perfect time in my life. I was going through a divorce. And, although I was excited about the future, I was still hesitant about starting over was seeking guidance to move forward in a positive and healthy way.

When I came across this book, it piqued my curiosity. What were the four agreements and could I use them to create the best possible future for myself?

Don Miguel Ruiz

Don Miguel Ruiz is a direct descendant of the Toltecs of the Eagle Knight lineage, an ancient Mexican civilization. He has dedicated his life to sharing his ancient knowledge with others. In his groundbreaking book, he describes four main pillars of living your best life, or as he calls them, the four agreements.

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz: Awaken to the Truth!

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The Beginning

According to Ruiz, your first agreements are everything you’ve been programmed to think from a very early age. The adults who raised you taught you what to believe about yourself and the world. And, you most likely adopted their opinions, limitations, and biases as your own.

They rewarded you when you were agreeable and followed the rules, and punished you when you rebelled. So, you learned to conform to a set of rules and beliefs, or became “domesticated”. You then created a whole life that reflected who you thought you were.

The Dream of Society

Ruiz calls this the dream of society. Instead of living authentically, we live to please others. Most of us end up doing what we’re supposed to do based on what we’ve been taught.

Awakening

Ruiz compels us to break these false agreements, and embark on a new journey by adopting the four agreements. In this way, you can rebuild your personal power and return to your true self. Then, you are free to manifest a new dream; one that is fulfilling and perfectly aligned to you!

The First Agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word

The first agreement is be impeccable with your word. Say only what you mean and speak with truth and integrity. Your words are powerful. They can destroy or empower based on how you use them.

Ruiz explains that being impeccable with your word means using your language to promote peace, love, and happiness for yourself and others. Unfortunately, many people use their words to tear others down in an attempt to boost their own ego.

For instance, you may internalize the negative things people say without question. If you’re called stupid or ugly repeatedly by those you trust, or it’s implied that you are “less than” in some way, you will most likely accept this as truth over time.

As a result, you may indulge in self-destructive behaviors, or make poor decisions, creating a life of misery. And, this is all due to a negative self-image based on falsehoods.

The New Dream

However, you also have the ability to build a beautiful world! Your words are so powerful that they can completely change your life and the lives of those around you.

When you spread love, kindness, compassion, and understanding, you honor and respect yourself and everything around you. In turn, you replace fear with trust, hurt with healing, and anger with joy. This one agreement can transform your entire world.

The Second Agreement: Don’t Take Anything Personally

“Whatever other people think of you is none of your business. If you start to make it your business, you’ll be offended for the rest of your life.”

Deepak Chopra

The second agreement is don’t take anything personally. Ruiz explains it this way. Imagine that your life is a movie and you are the main character, director, and producer. This movie is constantly playing in your mind. Therefore, you see everything through the lens of the story in your head.

You act in this movie according to all the agreements you’ve made with yourself. If you feel miserable, you interact with everyone in a negative way. And, if you are joyful, those high energy feelings will shine through in everything you do.

This is an important concept to keep in mind because the way other people treat you usually has nothing to do with you! It’s a direct reflection of how they feel!

If someone behaves rudely toward you, or even compliments you, it’s not about you. People can only relate to you at the level of how they feel about themselves!

Get Your Copy of The Four Agreements Here!

The Third Agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions

Don’t make assumptions is the third agreement. When you make assumptions, you assume that everyone views life the same way that you do. However, everyone is living out his or her own personal story, so this isn’t possible. Making assumptions is an unconscious behavior that causes conflicts and problems.

Ripple Effect

For example, imagine that you say hello to a colleague in the hallway, but get no response. Your colleague doesn’t acknowledge you. You can choose not to take it personally. That’s because her actions probably have nothing to do with you.

However, you might assume she doesn’t like you. You feel angry and hurt. Therefore, you may begin resent this person or even gossip about her and spread the story of how rudely she behaved.

In reality, the colleague may have just received bad news and was too preoccupied to notice you. Most of our pain and sadness comes from guessing at another person’s motivations.

So, not making assumptions means you don’t have to take anything personally. Consider another person’s perspective and communicate clearly.

The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best

The fourth agreement is my favorite and my daily mantra: always do your best. Always doing your best means that you consistently give your best effort under the circumstances.

Be present in all your interactions. This simply requires that you give time, consideration, and full attention to everything that you do. Behave as if no one thing or person is better or more important than another. Every act, no matter how small, deserves your greatest effort.

In this way, you’ll never have to second guess yourself, and you can continue to move forward with positivity and respect for everyone around you.

That being said, you’re not going to be in perfect form all the time! And, this means that your best one day may look very different than your best on another.

For example, if you’re sick or haven’t slept well, doing what you normally do would leave you depleted. On those days, simply do your best under the circumstances. You’re not going to be perfect or high energy all the time. And, that’s okay! Just show up in the best way you can.

This concept of always doing your best ties into the practice of honoring the present moment. When you completely accept the moment, your attention will be entirely focused on the task at hand. As a result, you will always do your best.

However, when you resist the moment by complaining, or wishing you were elsewhere, your not doing your best. Staying rooted in the present moment, and giving your best effort, will transform your life.

Finally, take action! Get out there and enjoy your life. Instead of spending time in front of the television, take a class or learn a new skill. Life is joyful when you live fearlessly in pursuit of your dreams.

Get Your Copy of The Four Agreements Here!

Adopt the Four Agreements!

Ruiz entreats us to break the agreements that have been imposed upon us. Adopt the four agreements, and recommit to them every day! By following the four agreements, you will transform your reality and attract all the love, joy, and abundance that life has to offer! As Don Miguel Ruiz says, “You will find that you don’t need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.” Share your favorite agreement below and get the conversation started. I’d love to hear from you!

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Disclosure: Melissa Damiani is a participant in the Routine Probiotics Program an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to merchant, and the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking amazon.com. Although I only promote products that I love, use, and have confidence in, always do your own research before purchasing any product or service. Read my disclaimer here.