The Female Midlife Crisis: Symptoms, Causes and Silver Lining

*Updated August 2024

The female midlife crisis is real. This can be an incredibly difficult phase of life due to the sheer volume of changes you may be experiencing. So, hang in there girl, I feel your pain. But, there is a silver lining. And, educating yourself is the most empowering thing you can do.

According to Web MD, a female midlife crisis can be triggered by changes you experience as you enter peri-menopause:

• Changes in eating habits
• Interrupted sleep patterns
• Feelings of hopelessness
• Restlessness, anxiety or irritability
• Feelings of guilt or worthlessness
• Decreased interest in activities you once enjoyed, including sex and hobbies
• Thoughts of suicide or attempts at suicide
• Physical aches or pains, like headaches or gastrointestinal upset

The Female Midlife Crisis: Symptoms, Causes and the Silver Lining

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My midlife “crisis” began with a quiet, but persistent feeling of unease. I started to experience the physical and emotional challenges that aging inevitably brings. I quickly realized I will probably have to dig deep here.

So, I began asking myself big life questions,

• Have I lived to my potential?
• Does my life truly reflect who I am today?
• Who does this new phase of my life require me to be?

Generation X and Midlife

If you’re reading this, you belong to Generation X with a birth year between 1965 to 1984. Many Gen X’ers are college educated and followed a similar life path. For instance, you lived independently and pursued a career before getting married.

You may have also decided not to have children. Or, you may have chosen to start a family after achieving a certain level of success in your career. And, these were purposeful, responsible decisions at the time. However, they can have weighty implications as you age.

6 Causes of the Female Midlife Crisis

A midlife crisis refers to an all too real issue. It can cause a lack of self-confidence. It can leave you questioning everything. There is no evidence to suggest that a female midlife crisis is triggered by reaching any particular age. However, there are many changes in life that can cause women to experience a female midlife crisis.

Here are some common generation specific stressors that can contribute to a female midlife crisis.

1. Debt

It’s all too easy to get into debt, especially in the more recent economic climate. And, due to the availability of credit cards and loans, it’s become quite a big issue. As a result, many Americans carry a credit card balance at the end of each month. And, finding yourself middle-aged, in debt, and facing retirement will add anxiety to an already stressful time in life. 

Although many Gen X’ers are highly educated, we’re actually downwardly mobile. Experts estimate that we have more debt than any other age group.

According to a June 2023 report by Credit Karma, Gen X members carry the most credit card debt. They have an average of $8,266. On top of this, Social Security is in danger. It could be depleted by the year 2033. This would happen right as many of us hit the retirement age.

2. Significant Loss

Also, our parents are aging and this is a tough transition to make. Many of us are still raising children, or have children in college, while caring for older or sick parents. And, the death of a parent can cause tremendous grief, challenging even the most resilient person.

3. Low Self-Esteem and Codependency

As a woman in midlife, aging may trigger self-doubt. You might also experience a loss of confidence due to all of the physical and hormonal changes you’re experiencing. And, if you don’t have a strong sense of self, your midlife transition will be even more taxing. It will also be difficult if you suffer from feelings of low self-esteem or codependency. 

Fear of rejection or embarrassment may keep you from seeking the help you need. As a result, you may avoid problems instead of trying to find solutions to them. Increased pressure can cause relationships to fail. And, some couples even end up divorcing in midlife.

4. Physical Changes

The road to menopause is not an easy one for most women. Peri-menopausal symptoms can run the gamut from bothersome to debilitating. And, they can last from several months to several years until you finally transition into menopause.

Irregular menstrual cycles, nausea, hot flashes, and night sweats can leave you frustrated. Weight gain, decrease in sex drive, and low energy can also leave you frustrated. These symptoms can also make you feel depressed. And, if you never had a child, it can be a time of grief and loss. However, there are some natural, healthy ways of relieving these symptoms.

With the help of a high quality probiotic routine, vitamins and supplements, yoga, and meditation, you can find relief. By following a healthy (or vegan) diet, you can even start feeling like your old self again!

5. Social Changes

As you get busier and face new challenges, your social circle may begin to look different. Friendships become harder to maintain and there are less opportunities to meet new people. Unfortunately, studies show that feeling isolated can cause depression, chronic stress, and poor sleep quality.

In addition, physical and emotional stressors can sometimes lead to the breakdown of a marriage. Getting divorced means losing a spouse and life partner. It also means the loss of long-term family relationships. There are also other implications to consider: becoming a single parent, moving households, loss of financial or social status, etc.

6. Emotional Changes

Perimenopause can trigger mood swings and emotional instability. You may also be grieving the loss of the youth and vitality you once took for granted. 

Starting as early as 35 and lasting into your 50’s, women in this stage can experience feelings of anger. They might also feel impatience, stress, depression, frustration, regret, sensitivity, and irritability.

The Silver Lining

All of this can seem overwhelming, and even a bit scary. But, that’s exactly why you’re here; you’re not alone! There are millions of women, just like you and me, going through a very similar experience. Have faith! The female midlife crisis is just another stage of life. It is like any other stage, with its own unique set of challenges and obstacles. But, there is also a huge potential for growth! 

1. Do one thing that makes you feel brave.

When everything feels uncomfortable, there is a unique opening for new possibilities. That’s because it’s precisely when you don’t feel like yourself that you can more readily take risks. And, opportunities that were once closed to you, will now reveal themselves.

So, whether it’s signing up for a yoga class, traveling solo, learning a new language, or joining an on-line dating app, do something that challenges your comfort zone. By participating in new activities, you will change the way you view yourself. And, this will give you the boost of confidence you need right now.

2. Re-frame the way you think about the challenging aspects of midlife.

The female midlife crisis can leave you questioning everything about life. And, although this can be uncomfortable, it’s also an incredible opportunity for growth and change. So, push beyond your limitations. It’s time to consciously create a new you!

3. Let go of the past.

Midlife is the perfect time for new beginnings! It can be extremely liberating, and even exciting, to put the past behind you. So, define who you are at this stage of your life. You’ve gained a lifetime of wisdom, and now it’s time to evolve into a newer, fresher version of you!

Start by creating a vision of your perfect life. Then, take small but consistent action steps toward your goals. Once you begin seeing results, you’ll be inspired to keep going!

4. Focus on you!

Congratulations, you made it! After spending the last few decades caring for others, now is the time to focus on you. Self care is an effective way to care for yourself body, mind, and soul. And, don’t you deserve it at this point in your life?

The Female Midlife Crisis

Being informed about the root causes of your midlife crisis is the first step in overcoming its challenges. When you can identity the why behind your pain or depression, you can begin the healing process.

So, what are your thoughts about the causes of the female midlife crisis? Did any of these resonate with you? Have you been enjoying any of the benefits of midlife? Comment below and let’s get the conversation started!

Keep Reading…

• To create a personalized vitamin routine, click here.
• To decrease bloating and boost mood, click here.
• To create the perfect exercise routine for you, click here.
• To learn how to meditate for relaxation, click here.
• To find effective anti-aging supplements, click here.
• To find inspiration in midlife, click here.

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Disclosure: Melissa Damiani is a participant in the Routine Probiotics Program an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to merchant, and the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking amazon.com. Although I only promote products that I love, use, and have confidence in, always do your own research before purchasing any product or service. Read my disclaimer here.